I ate the devil.

I started this new diet, yeah I know, you just groaned, or moaned, I said the "D" word. Sorry, I didn't want to do it, but I'm so fat, I only see my feet when I'm nearly unconscious, having exhaled as much as I can trying to tie my overburdened footwear. I feel like I'm at the gym, and I need a spotter, "Honey can you brace your back on the wall and try to crush me for a minute, make sure you are pushing where the 2 x 4 in the wall is please?  Velcro seems like a good idea these days. I am in my 40's, not halfway yet, but more than halfway to halfway. So every day I log in on line, I enter how many meals, snacks, ounces of water etc... I have ingested. I lost 8 pounds last week, would have been more, if not for my daughters birthday party. Anyway, so at my work, we get free snacks, chips, donuts, granola, there are even free soda fountains, sounds great, but not when you are trying to cut back. So, last week I picked up some donuts, the little sleeve with 6 baby donuts, in a little donut crib, so you can open the end, and let them all slide into your mouth. I decided to try not to eat them, so I took a marker and wrote on the plastic, "I am the devil." I kinda hid the package, so people walking by don't think I am saying that "I" am the devil, people think enough stuff about me already. Last week my resolve was strong, this week after a disastrous weekend, it crumbled like tiny donuts, skydiving from a sleeve, into my smiling gob. I actually did not eat them yet, but they increase in beauty every half hour or so, and I still have five and a half hours left of work, so maybe my title was a self-fulfilling prophecy, it's almost lunch time, have a nice day.